God – Father to the Fatherless
 
“Let your character or moral disposition be free from love of money (including greed, avarice, lust, and craving for earthly possessions) and be satisfied with your present (circumstances and with what you have); for He (God) Himself has said, I will not in any way fail you nor give you up nor leave you without support. I will not, I will not, I will not in any degree leave you helpless nor forsake nor let you down (relax my hold on you)! Assuredly not!  (3 times “I will not” – God our Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.)”
 
ON THE 15TH OF DECEMBER 2000, André (my husband and the father of my two sons) was admitted to the heart and lung division at Medi Clinic. He had over 2 litres of water in his lungs. It was a shock to us. The doctors thought it was TB, and a bisection of his lung was done early the next morning. André was released after 3 days, and with the water drained out of his lungs,  felt a lot more comfortable. André had just started a new job after being unemployed for about 7 months. We had no medical aid, policies etc. Financially it was devastating – we sold everything possible to cope with the financial burden. On the 4th January 2001, the doctor called and requested we see him – the laboratory results were back. We sat across the desk as he told us the news. André was diagnosed with Mesothelioma of the right lung. (The worst form of asbestos cancer – and it was taking over his whole body.)
We went straight from the doctor to our area Pastor and started to pray, believing and trusting God for healing. We are members of a local church where the uncompromised Word of God is taught,  so we know that God is our Healer, our Salvation, our God and our Father.
What transpired thereafter was a five month battle – physically, spiritually and emotionally. We were transferred to a provincial hospital for further treatment as we no longer had the financial means to pay for expensive doctors. I sold our second car, our computers and our CD’s in order to survive. I worked day and night, nursing André and trying to earn a living. Our boys were then 4 and 7 years old. I am an artist and started drawing pictures for galleries – dropping my prices substantially for immediate cash. Life was like a rollercoaster. Days would fly by – physically I didn’t feel the tiredness anymore because God would just supernaturally strengthen me every day. The burden of feeding our children, paying the rent, and coping with all the side effects of the chemotherapy was part of a daily routine. Our church members were a blessing, always helping us, bringing food just in time. Friends helped with the payments on my smaller car to prevent the bank from repossessing it. André lost an average of 30 kg a month. Church members prayed daily both with us and for us.  I was ridiculed by strangers who heard about our situation – “Would you still believe in God if André died?” was one of the many questions that I was asked. I can only say that: God’s Word never changes, it is the Truth. Circumstances may change, we might not understand why things happen, but God’s Word is clear on the fact that God gives life, healing, prosperity, protection and above all, grace and love.
I became a warrior – fighting for my husband’s life, standing up for the Truth, not compromising on the words that we spoke. God is our only Lifeline. We experienced many miracles; our landlord reduced our rent, my pictures would sell in the galleries, and the doctors were amazed that André could still breath – even though both his lungs were completely taken over by the cancer. Eventually he became too tired to fight. The physical pain and the burden he carried of not being able to care for our family was too much for him. And, that was how he went home. I cried out to God, “Where now? What now? Where do I start?”
Do I still believe in God? YES, more than ever! He has bought us with His blood, and life doesn’t stop when our physical bodies die. My sons witnessed everything and because of that have an understanding of God’s Word and eternal life. André didn’t die, he is living an everlasting life with God!
We  moved in with our home-cell leaders who graciously took us in and cared for us.  They loved us through all the agony of losing our loved one. We became covenant friends, our children bonded and there were never any offences or disagreements.
I believed and trusted God to help us. As the new Head of our home I had to trust God for our finances.  With God as our High Priest we wanted to be a blessing to others instead of a burden. He says clearly in His Word that He is now my Husband, and the Father of the fatherless. Three months later I could afford a tiny garden flat, the size of a double garage. We had lots of fun – taking turns to sleep on the floor because we could only fit in 2 small beds. I discovered that little boys kick a lot when they sleep. Armand, the younger, had to bath in a plastic basin as he was scared of the shower and there wasn’t a bath. We were drawn closer together, and God became our Provider, our Source and Comforter.
After three months, I was contacted by a parent at Reinhard’s school. They had an old stable on their farm that had been converted into servants’ quarters, and invited us to stay there free of charge. What a miracle! God had made a way for us.  A little hard work, a good clean-up, some fresh paint made it our home for 18 months. At the beginning of 2002 I started to work at a  University.  One year later I was completely debt free.  God’s Word isON THE 15TH OF DECEMBER 2000, André (my husband and the father of my two sons) was admitted to the heart and lung division at Medi Clinic. He had over 2 litres of water in his lungs. It was a shock to us. The doctors thought it was TB, and a bisection of his lung was done early the next morning. André was released after 3 days, and with the water drained out of his lungs,  felt a lot more comfortable. André had just started a new job after being unemployed for about 7 months. We had no medical aid, policies etc. Financially it was devastating – we sold everything possible to cope with the financial burden. On the 4th January 2001, the doctor called and requested we see him – the laboratory results were back. We sat across the desk as he told us the news. André was diagnosed with Mesothelioma of the right lung. (The worst form of asbestos cancer – and it was taking over his whole body.)
We went straight from the doctor to our area Pastor and started to pray, believing and trusting God for healing. We are members of a local church where the uncompromised Word of God is taught, so we know that God is our Healer, our Salvation, our God and our Father.
What transpired thereafter was a five month battle – physically, spiritually and emotionally. We were transferred to a provincial hospital for further treatment as we no longer had the financial means to pay for expensive doctors. I sold our second car, our computers and our CD’s in order to survive. I worked day and night, nursing André and trying to earn a living. Our boys were then 4 and 7 years old. I am an artist and started drawing pictures for galleries – dropping my prices substantially for immediate cash. Life was like a rollercoaster. Days would fly by – physically I didn’t feel the tiredness anymore because God would just supernaturally strengthen me every day. The burden of feeding our children, paying the rent, and coping with all the side effects of the chemotherapy was part of a daily routine. Our church members were a blessing, always helping us, bringing food just in time. Friends helped with the payments on my smaller car to prevent the bank from repossessing it. André lost an average of 30 kg a month. Church members prayed daily both with us and for us.  I was ridiculed by strangers who heard about our situation – “Would you still believe in God if André died?” was one of the many questions that I was asked. I can only say that: God’s Word never changes, it is the Truth. Circumstances may change, we might not understand why things happen, but God’s Word is clear on the fact that God gives life, healing, prosperity, protection and above all, grace and love.
I became a warrior – fighting for my husband’s life, standing up for the Truth, not compromising on the words that we spoke. God is our only Lifeline. We experienced many miracles; our landlord reduced our rent, my pictures would sell in the galleries, and the doctors were amazed that André could still breath – even though both his lungs were completely taken over by the cancer. Eventually he became too tired to fight. The physical pain and the burden he carried of not being able to care for our family was too much for him. And, that was how he went home. I cried out to God, “Where now? What now? Where do I start?”
Do I still believe in God? YES, more than ever! He has bought us with His blood, and life doesn’t stop when our physical bodies die. My sons witnessed everything and because of that have an understanding of God’s Word and eternal life. André didn’t die, he is living an everlasting life with God!
We  moved in with our home-cell leaders who graciously took us in and cared for us.  They loved us through all the agony of losing our loved one. We became covenant friends, our children bonded and there were never any offences or disagreements.
I believed and trusted God to help us. As the new Head of our home I had to trust God for our finances.  With God as our High Priest we wanted to be a blessing to others instead of a burden. He says clearly in His Word that He is now my Husband, and the Father of the fatherless. Three months later I could afford a tiny garden flat, the size of a double garage. We had lots of fun – taking turns to sleep on the floor because we could only fit in2 small beds. I discovered that little boys kick a lot when they sleep. Armand, the younger, had to bath in a plastic basin as he was scared of the shower and there wasn’t a bath. We were drawn closer together, and God became our Provider, our Source and Comforter.
After three months, I was contacted by a parent at Reinhard’s school. They had an old stable on their farm that had been converted into servants’ quarters, and invited us to stay there free of charge. What a miracle! God had made a way for us.  A little hard work, a good clean-up, some fresh paint made it our home for 18 months. At the beginning of 2002 I started to work at a  University.  One year later I was completely debt free.  God’s Word is so clear on how we should live. I would like to thank my senior Pastors, Allan and Janine Bagg for always teaching the uncompromising Word of God. Financial principles on tithing, offering, partnership etc. form the basis of our family’s budget. We tithe as a family on everything.
Now, five years later, I look at my sons and see two gorgeous young gentlemen. I have entrusted my boys to God to nurture and grow into strong men.  I am amazed every day at just how God supplies our physical needs and how He places men in my two son’s lives to mentor them. Our area Pastors Ingo and Tracey Muller, play a major role in our lives. The boys love and respect Ps Ingo because of his exemplary life. We also have other friends who invite Reinhard to rugby. Other friends invite us to go camping with them – the boys love jumping off high cliffs into the water.  Others invite us on 4×4 trail rides. My boys have been blessed with activities that others possibly just dream about. If not for these kind invites my boys would never have these opportunities.  Not the sort of activities a single mom can offer.
We have experienced so many wonderful things through God’s Grace. Besides these wonderful faithful friends, I am blessed with wonderful colleagues at work and my children have excellent teachers at school. Our children’s church Pastor always encourages my sons. I count it a blessing to be part of a local church. We are surrounded by people who not only listen to the Word but ‘do’ it. Whenever a need arises God brings  people across our path to help. It doesn’t matter what that need is – God always sends help. His safety net is always there to catch us. Sometimes I wonder how and what I should pray for when in difficult situations, but before I even ask, God  sends someone to help. How awesome and good is our God!
“Your Father knows the things you have need of, before you ask Him.”  Matt. 6:8.  I feel so blessed wherever I go, God just grants His favour in every situation of my life.  I am so grateful.
Another blessing is that we live in a flat opposite the boy’sschool and this has made my life easier, what with all the different school activities.
God gave me a Scripture to hold on to at the beginning of my walk as a single mother.  “Let your character or moral disposition be free from love of money (including greed, avarice, lust, and craving for earthly possessions) and be satisfied with your present (circumstances and with what you have); for He (God) Himself has said, I will not in any way fail you nor give you up nor leave you without support. I will not, I will not, I will not in any degree leave you helpless nor forsake nor let you down (relax my hold on you)! Assuredly not! (3 times “I will not” – God our Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.)”  Heb. 13:5
The knowledge and revelation that God takes care of us leaves us with only one thing to do – to live our lives according to His Word. I encourage other single parents to seek God first in everything. Surround yourselves with people who have wisdom and the true knowledge of God’s Word. Get involved in a local church, be part of a family, and join a home cell.
Yes, there are many days when there seems to be no future, where life feels like a battle just to survive, but this is when the love and grace of God just surrounds us. Focus on what the Word of God says. Someone once asked me: “How can you always say you are well when you’ve lost your husband and you are working so hard to cope with everything?” My answer was that the knowing that God is our Father, that He is our Provider, our Everything; is the reason it is well with us. It doesn’t matter what is wrong, what is needed, our hope and faith is in God.”   It is a total shift in focus  placing your hope and faith in what God can do and not in the negative things that satan is trying to do.
I’d like to see the Church (that is every Christian) making an effort to reach out to single mothers and fatherless children.
Our society also needs Godly men to get involved in school and church activities displaying a positive male figure, teaching and helping not just the fatherless children but all children. Become an inspiration to others by doing things God’s way. We as Christians can do so much more to help each other. Let us therefore be true followers of Christ.